Stuck in Being

Adidam

Balance is the hardest endeavor for a human being. While, reaching a state of perfect balance is unachievable, or better yet, is something we are moving toward to within the domain of evolution, and might be considered as a final destination, remembering about balance is crucial to unfolding of a healthy self.

There are various stages of the spiritual development of self, and each stage has its own dues to be paid, before self can move on to the next level. The development of other domains of self, such as physical, emotional, psychological, mental does not necessarily develop along side with the spiritual. Nevertheless, each domain, no doubt, undergoes fundamental changes, which, based on the traditional point of view, might be defined as dysfunctional.  

The first stage is an initial awakening to realization, that life as we know it, is not exactly true, and there is more to be discovered. The awakening is usually triggered by some shocking event in our life; some of them are a relationship failure, and the death of loved ones. 

 Even though, a character of an event might be different for everyone, the common attribute of all those events is having a devastating experience, which prompts our self to denounce the existing “world”, and to look for an answer beyond the usual, and known sources.

Don’t confuse a mere interest for a spiritual life, which is manifested in reading various theories, and even practicing them, with the real awakening. What precedes the authentic awakening is the tragedy of self, an absolute disappointment with life as it is. And the search begins.

When self discovers that there is more to life than it has known, it is inspired, and excited. At this stage self is obsessed with reading, and learning all about the new way of perceiving, and dealing with the world. Little does it know, that its life is about to turn into nightmare.

I need to clarify something, before I can go on, and describe the unfolding of self, and the stages it goes through, on it’s way to discovering the reality. There are endless paths of many selves, and each of them is unique, and as valuable as the others, from the point of an absolute (God).

Hindu Philosophy classifies the paths as the following: Bhakti, Karma, and Jnani

“Self-realization or direct intuitive perception of the Supreme Self is necessary for attaining freedom and perfection. This Jnana Yoga or the path of Wisdom is, however, not meant for the masses whose hearts are not pure enough and whose intellects are not sharp enough to understand and practice this razor-edge path. Hence, Karma Yoga and Upasana (Bhakti) are to be practiced first, which will render the heart pure and make it fit for the reception of Knowledge.”

I would replace “ hearts are not pure” with “being ignorant”. :-)

The path I am going to talk about is Jnana Yoga, so if you are on the path of Wisdom, razor-edge path, you may find this article interesting, and hopefully helpful.

What if you are not sure whether you are on this path or not? 

The thumb up is that you are not devoted to one particular theory; you are determined to realize the truth, no matter what; you know with all your heart that Jnana path is your vocation in life.

The above is manifested only when self is approaching the third stage of spiritual development (the dawn after the dark night), at the first two stages self is only intuitively aware of it.

Back to the first stage. It is a common stage for many, including Jnana students.

At this stage, self is introduced to the various theories, that dazzle its mind, and inspire its heart. This is the stage where the conditioning of self is taking place, conditioning to new beliefs, and new perception of the world.

The difference between Jnana students, and others, who are merely attracted to a mystical experience of the spiritual development (states of consciousness), is that Jnana students don’t accept any theory as a final, or as an absolute one. Thus, they never stop questioning, analyzing, and contemplating on already acquired knowledge, and awkwardly applying it to their day-to-day life.

Let’s take a close look at what exactly is happening to self at this stage, and how the conceptual knowledge (life is an illusion) slowly reconditions other domains of self.

“World is an illusion, and nothing matters” is simply a belief. Nevertheless, for self, at this stage, it is considered as an absolute truth. The next few years, or so, the belief that nothing matters, since, life is an illusion, transforms some existing beliefs that self lived by.

 Life appears meaningless; everything what self was living for, before the awakening, doesn’t have the same value any more; self suddenly sees clearly that everything is fake, that people act upon fear; the world is seen as a dark place.

This is the beginning of the second stage (the dark night of the soul), and it is a partial death of the old self, the “gross self.” The old beliefs don’t function any more, and the new beliefs are not there yet. The new, subtle (psychic) self is being born.

We live in an amazing time, when self is able to express itself in a way, it couldn’t even dream about in the past. In the past, the Jnana path followers, and among them many well known gurus, that “reached the state of enlightenment”, had to skip the advanced developmental stages of self, simply because, it was not a safe place for self to unfold.

As a result, they emphasized the practice of the states of consciousness, ranging from dreaming to nondual, while self was stuck in the second stage of development, basically, strengthening the belief that nothing matters. Experiencing the nondual state of consciousness from within the second stage of transformation is not a final, or an absolute experience.

Self is a construct of the society, so if the society is not ready to transform, there is no safe, and understanding place for self to develop; self is not capable of doing it on its own.  Here we can clearly see, that self and the society is one mechanism.     

And even when self makes an attempt to transform (Adi Da is a classical example), the society rejects self, moreover condemns. The third stage is the highest stage anyone could get to, up until now, including all well renown, supposedly, enlightened saints, gurus, and masters.  

The second stage has all the signs of a classical depression, but indeed it is the dark night of the soul, right before the dawn.  Sharp intellect takes self out of this stage, by coming up with a fresh insight: “If everything is an illusion, then I can carry out all my fantasies”.  Self steps into the third stage.

This is the time when self must bring out all the subconscious beliefs, sort them out, and announce them to the world; live them out, so these too could be seen as an illusion. But live them out is a must, for self to be transformed. It is also known as a shadow work. Everything else is just an endless mental, and intellectual masturbation. 

When the society is not ready yet for such interaction with self, self goes within, and is fixed with the belief, that nothing matters, but consciousness. Self might have visions of the future existence of the society, having realized what are the next steps in evolution of humans. Nevertheless, if self is not able to manifest those steps in the current stage of development, it is stuck within this particular stage, and no further development is possible.

Are you practicing nondual state of consciousness? Got addicted to this state?

Have you lost all the motivation for the physical existence, thinking that you have figured it all out, and nothing matters?

If you have those thoughts, remember, this is all an illusion, including the thoughts that nothing matters. There is more, much more, that you can still do in this dual world. Take that experience, the experience of nondual consciousness, and bring it into the physical world, create new way of relating to the world, find your passion, and live it out. This is a tough one, and if you think you don’t want it, have no desire for it, it might be, that you are still very much living in fear.

There are five or six stages of spiritual development of self. This is just a theory, supported by many other, previously realized theories.

The main idea of this theory is, that the physical self must be transformed into subtler being, in order to enter into nondual consciousness, and experience it to the fullest. 

As if evolution of self cultivates such a being, the final product of which is nondual consciousness. Merging the physical and ethereal is consciousness recalling itself.

 After all, if everything is an illusion of mind, and we are consciousness, we have to live out our own creation.  Consciousness is playing a game, by creating endless forms in its “mind”. In a process of a creation, it gets involved to the point, where it loses itself in the maze of the opposites, forgetting about its origin.

The absolute transformation is possible only when self realizes every single construction of its mind as an illusion, down to the physical world around. Realization comes from the direct experience, not conceptual (intellectual) understanding. We have a long way to go, so there are still many more illusions to be realized. Until then, much of what we think we have realized is just a conceptual knowledge.

The Search Box is set up against my favorite sites, that dedicated to study of consciousness, beliefs and related subjects.